How to Make relationship work with an older man
Relationship tips for females

How to Make Relationship Work with an Older Man

We all recall when Ashley Olsen, age 27, made news for allegedly dating Moneyball director Bennett Miller, age 47. Also, I am aware that some younger men do date older women. Kyle Jones, a 31-year-old Pittsburgh resident, raised eyebrows by dating Marjorie McCool, a 91-year-old great-grandmother. I am not sexist, but this article is about how to make relationships work with an older man. 

Let’s address the perception that a woman who dates an older man has turned against her own kind. This is because she conforms to the stereotype that men should be providers and women should be the prize. However, the technique is not only common but also highly recommended. This has both biological and psychological causes.

We all know, for instance, that girls enter puberty earlier than boys, and that their fertility is limited. Psychologically, women attain emotional maturity somewhat earlier than men. Statistics show that American men tend to marry younger women, even though these relationships are doomed to fail.

Thomas Pollet and Sophia Pratt found that married women in the United States were 4.1 years younger than married men. The stats are very intriguing. In other words, when these extremely wealthy men remarry, their second spouses were, on average, 22 years younger. 

How to Make relationship work with an older man

How to make a relationship work with an older man

There are relatively few advantages to dating an older man, and most dads would oppose their daughters dating one. To be fair, some couples have lived together well despite their age gap.

Here are some suggestions to make a relationship with an older man work:


This is the defining factor in all relationships. Despite your differences, the willingness to communicate is what keeps the flame alive. Communicate with him, listen to him, and exchange views. 

Discuss items you like and detest. Talk about your future plans. That’s one wonderful thing about marrying an older man—he listens better than a younger one. Read a lot so that you can talk about politics, culture, and sports. This gets me to my subsequent point.

Share common interests

Try watching sports or his preferred genre of movies with him, and make an effort to find them actually engaging. Also, get him to do the same for your favorite activities. Collaboration promotes communication, as I mentioned in my previous point.

Give one another space

Yes, I just stated that you should find activities to do together, and I do not mean to contradict myself. You should spend time apart so that you can each do the things that the other dislikes. 

There is no point in, for instance, trying to force your man to go shopping with you. Allow him to enjoy a beer with a friend while you squander his money. You must find a balance between collaborating and being independent.

Have a plan

Before entering into an exclusive age-gap relationship, Jasdeep Mago, a neuropsychologist based in Mumbai, advises that the discourse must be geared toward the future without delay.

She said, “Perhaps the older person is thinking about settling down and wants a safe life, but the younger person would still want to try out and learn about all their options.”

Mago believes that as we progress through life, our career objectives can change and that both spouses should strive to accept the stage that the other is in. 

While one partner may like to luxuriate in the accomplishment of a well-established career or consider how to close that chapter of their life in the near future, the other may be preoccupied with creating their own.

Instead of attempting to compel your partner to adopt the lifestyle that your particular life stage necessitates, be supportive of where they are in theirs. Co-create your future plans with these differences in mind.

Know your differences

Even though there is a 20 years age difference between the older man and the woman, the couple must be receptive to each other’s differences and view them as strengths rather than flaws.

The older man might be eager to get married and settle down while the younger lady might be thinking about her career life. 

However, he may not ask you to speed up your timetables if both of you know your differences and adhere to it.

He will certainly allow you to focus on what was most important to you at the time, and that will give you the bravery and support you require to take our relationship to the next level. 

Maybe in the next few years, you can decide to create a family with him. Even though he got to this stage before she did, he can still wait patiently for her to desire it equally. On the other hand, you can also help him reach what he thinks are important milestones right now.

Ignore the insults

Our lives are too brief and uncertain for us to worry about others who have no genuine stake in them.

Many relationship experts concur that acceptance can be liberating in such situations. “There will always be some degree of social disapproval. Some days it may get to you, but as long as you have comforting and intimate conversations with each other, it doesn’t matter. “

Have Patience

Dealing with unusual circumstances demands patience. Being serene and quiet helps you win half the battle because you can see things in perspective.

Be adaptable

Avoid being overly rigid with your partner. If you want to have a strong relationship with your partner, you need to be flexible and sensitive.

Have an open mind

Life will present you with a variety of obstacles at different stages. Life will become clearer if you maintain an open mind and confidence in your decisions and relationships.

Enjoy silence

Occasionally, less is more, so take a rest and do nothing. Enjoy peace and silence rather than complain about trivial matters.

Have an active sex life

If you are pleased and happy with physical closeness, you will love your companion more. This maintains their dependence on one another and ensures that most problems are resolved.

Unconditional love

 Love your old man unconditionally or without conditions or restrictions. When spouses are loving, caring, and affectionate, even the most difficult situations may be handled with relative ease.

Why Do Women Choose Older Men to Date?

Below are some reasons why women choose older men to date;

Financial Gain

Money appears to be the obvious response, so I shall begin with that. If a woman were to marry a man of the same or somewhat younger age, they would certainly experience initial difficulties until they could both establish themselves in their respective careers. In response to such a problem, a woman would seek financial security in a relationship with an older man.

Life Experience

 Experience is a desirable characteristic. In all areas, older men tend to be more advanced. As a direct result of their age, they exude a certain degree of confidence and internal stability. Wisdom and emotional intelligence can be just as attractive to women as financial wealth.

Better Sex

We frequently believe that younger guys can fulfill our greatest bedroom dreams, but this is not always the case. Sometimes, the experience of an older man might lead directly to transcendental sex because he has had time to reflect on what has worked and what has not in the bedroom.

He is identical to Pops

As previously stated, a woman may marry a man who resembles her father. Normal behavior is to seek the safety and attention you are accustomed to. Typically, older guys possess such a caring and loving disposition.

Less games are played

 As a result of their life experiences, older men are frequently more trustworthy. This indicates that they are typically less promiscuous and more committed to being a person who makes you feel confident about settling down.

Emotional stability/Reliability

 Lastly, younger women have an easier time relating to older men. Typically, women in their twenties are still attempting to reconcile their identities while navigating the ups and downs of emotional development. Emotional stability is what they require, and an older man can supply it.

The Cultural History and the Modern Trend

Historically, age-gap relationships were common and frequently the norm. In Classical Greece, thirty-year-old males regularly married girls in their mid-teens. It is common knowledge that men of status and renown will also pursue and marry young women. Monarchs such as Henry VIII preferred far younger wives. In many arranged marriages, the men were significantly older than the women.

Online dating sites have made it easier for women to find men of all types in the modern era. In fact, many of them are filled with married males posing as single or divorced. Due to the fact that these services attract more males than women, they frequently give women advantages like free registration and anonymity. All of this facilitates younger women’s ability to meet and date older men.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is a relationship with a 20-year age difference possible?

There are numerous 20-year age gap partnerships around the globe, but their success cannot be guaranteed. These relationships may encounter challenges and garner social scrutiny and evaluation. Additionally, the couple may have vastly different preferences. However, with mutual understanding and open communication, they might make it work.

What does the Bible have to say about age differences in marriage?

There are no verses in the Bible that specifically address the appropriate age gap in marriage. Instead, it emphasizes that marriage is a holy institution that should be respected.

In conclusion;

Age is irrelevant when it comes to forming relationships. However, it is also unwise to neglect the critical age-related aspects that might cause rifts in relationships. 

Nonetheless, the decision to date someone with a significant age gap is purely personal. If you want to make a relationship work with an older man,  then you must be ready to communicate openly and honestly about your desires and requirements. The age difference should never be an issue as long as you are both happy in your relationship.

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